How to File for Custody in NC: Forms, Service, and Mediation

To file for custody in NC, you start by filing a complaint at the Clerk of Superior Court in the county where the child lives, where the child is physically present, or where either parent lives. The base filing fee is around $150 for a district court civil action, though additional costs may apply.¹ Neither parent has an automatic advantage — judges evaluate “all relevant factors” under G.S. 50-13.2 and grant whatever arrangement best promotes the child’s welfare.²

Confirm North Carolina Can Hear Your Case

Before anything else, make sure North Carolina has jurisdiction under the Uniform Child Custody Jurisdiction and Enforcement Act. The main test is the home state rule: the child must have lived in North Carolina with a parent for at least six consecutive months immediately before filing.³ For an infant under six months, the child must have lived here since birth. Brief trips and vacations count toward the six months rather than breaking the period.

Limited alternatives exist when North Carolina isn’t the home state — for example, when no other state qualifies and the child has significant connections here, or when the child is physically present and faces an emergency involving abuse or abandonment. Those routes are narrow.

If a valid custody order already exists from another state, federal law generally requires North Carolina to honor it. Under the Parental Kidnapping Prevention Act, the issuing state keeps jurisdiction as long as a parent or the child still lives there.⁴ To change that order, you generally need to return to the state that issued it.

Decide What You’re Asking For

North Carolina recognizes two dimensions of custody, and your complaint should specify which arrangement you want and why it serves the child.

Legal custody covers major decisions about the child’s schooling, medical treatment, and religious upbringing. Joint legal custody splits that authority between both parents. Sole legal custody puts it with one.
Physical custody is where the child actually lives day to day. Joint physical custody means roughly equal time; when one parent has primary physical custody, the other typically receives a visitation schedule.

Judges can grant joint custody, sole custody to one parent, or in some circumstances custody to a non-parent.² No legal presumption favors mothers over fathers. If either parent requests joint custody, the court must consider it, though consideration isn’t the same as approval.

Forms You’ll Need

The North Carolina Judicial Branch publishes standardized forms at nccourts.gov. Most counties bundle the core documents into a Child Custody Pro Se Packet.⁵ For a custody filing you’ll typically work with three documents:

A Complaint for Custody, which is the core pleading stating what arrangement you want and the facts supporting it.
The Affidavit as to Status of Minor Child (AOC-CV-609), which requires a five-year residency history of the child. You list every address where the child has lived during the past five years, along with the name, current address, and relationship of every person the child lived with. Fill it out completely; blank fields raise concerns with judges.⁶
The Civil Summons (AOC-CV-100), which the clerk issues after you file. It notifies the other parent of the lawsuit and gives them 30 days to respond.⁷

Gather the full legal names and current addresses of both parents, the child’s full name and date of birth, and copies of any existing custody or protective orders involving the child from any state. Disclose those orders in your filing — overlapping orders from different jurisdictions cause serious enforcement problems. Your county’s packet may add local cover sheets or extra forms, so call the clerk’s office in your filing county before you go. Use black ink so documents scan cleanly, and sign any notary-block forms only in front of a commissioned notary.

If either parent is an active-duty service member, the Servicemembers Civil Relief Act may allow a stay of at least 90 days if military duties prevent that parent from appearing.

Filing at the Clerk’s Office

You file at the Clerk of Superior Court in a county authorized by G.S. 50-13.5(f): where the child resides, where the child is physically present, or where either parent lives.⁸ If a divorce or separation case is already pending, the custody claim typically must be joined with that existing action.

Bring the originals plus enough copies for yourself and each party you’ll serve. The Wake County packet, for example, asks for the original plus three copies.⁹ Call your county’s clerk if you’re unsure.

The clerk collects the filing fee when you submit the complaint. Under G.S. 7A-305, the base costs for a district court civil action include $16 for courtroom facilities, $4 for court technology, and $130 for General Court of Justice support, adding up to $150.¹ Additional fees or local surcharges may apply. After you pay, the clerk assigns a case number and stamps your documents, which officially starts your case.

If You Can’t Afford the Filing Fee

You can ask to proceed without paying by filing a Petition to Proceed as an Indigent (form AOC-G-106).¹⁰ The clerk must approve the petition if you receive SNAP benefits, Work First Family Assistance, or Supplemental Security Income, or if you’re represented by a legal aid organization. Even without those, a judge or clerk can waive the fee if you show you’re unable to advance court costs.¹¹

Serve the Other Parent

Once the clerk issues the summons, you must deliver copies of the filed complaint and summons to the other parent. You cannot hand-deliver the papers yourself.¹² Choose one of the approved methods:

Sheriff’s office. Take the documents to the sheriff in the county where the other parent lives and request personal service. The statutory fee is $30 per item of civil process served.¹³
Certified or registered mail. Send the documents to the other parent’s home using certified mail with return receipt requested, or registered mail with signature confirmation. The signed card comes back as proof.
Designated delivery service. FedEx, UPS, or DHL works as long as the service provides a delivery receipt and the documents are addressed to the other parent’s home.¹²

After service, file proof with the clerk — an Affidavit of Service or the original signed return receipt card. Without proof of service on file, the case cannot move forward, and no judge can issue custody orders against someone who was never properly notified.

When There’s an Emergency

If your child faces immediate danger, you don’t have to wait for the standard timeline. Under G.S. 50-13.5(d)(3), a court can enter a temporary custody order without advance notice to the other parent (an “ex parte” order) if the judge finds that the child faces a substantial risk of bodily injury, sexual abuse, or abduction from North Carolina.¹⁴ Judges enforce that threshold strictly. Vague concerns about the other parent won’t clear it.

Bring concrete evidence: medical records, police reports, CPS involvement, threatening text messages, photos of injuries. If the court grants the emergency order, a follow-up hearing gets scheduled promptly so the other parent has a chance to respond. Outside of emergencies, courts can also enter non-emergency temporary orders while the full case is pending, but those require notice — typically 10 days for a custody motion in a pending action.

Mandatory Mediation Before Trial

North Carolina requires mediation before a contested custody case goes to trial. Under G.S. 50-13.1, when the court identifies a disputed custody or visitation issue, it must refer the case to the Custody Mediation and Visitation Program either before or at the same time it sets a hearing.¹⁵ You attend an orientation class and then at least one mediation session with the other parent.¹⁶

Court-provided mediation is free. A trained mediator helps you and the other parent work through physical custody schedules, holidays, decision-making authority, and communication rules. Any agreement you reach goes to the judge for approval and becomes a binding order. Courts can waive mediation in some situations, including cases involving domestic violence.

What Happens After You File

The other parent has 30 days after being served to file a written Answer.⁷ They can respond to your allegations, take their own position on custody, and file counterclaims asking for a different arrangement.

If the other parent never responds, you can seek a default under NC Rule 55. The clerk enters the default, then a judge decides the custody arrangement. Even in default, custody isn’t automatic. The judge still has to find that the arrangement serves the child’s best interests. Custody is not a matter a court will rubber-stamp because one side didn’t show up.

If mediation doesn’t resolve the dispute, the case moves toward a hearing. You’ll coordinate with the local Calendaring Office or the judge’s assistant for a court date and prepare to present evidence about your relationship with the child, your home, and why your proposed arrangement fits the child’s needs.

How Judges Decide Custody

North Carolina judges have broad discretion, but G.S. 50-13.2 anchors the decision to one standard: the arrangement that best promotes the child’s interest and welfare. There’s no rigid checklist. The judge must consider “all relevant factors” and issue written findings explaining the decision.²

The statute does require the court to specifically address three things:

Any acts of domestic violence between the parties. If domestic violence occurred, the judge must enter orders protecting the victims.
The safety of the child, including physical safety, emotional well-being, and the stability of the home.
The safety of either party from domestic violence by the other, including whether a proposed arrangement leaves a parent at continued risk.

Beyond those, judges commonly look at the child’s existing relationships, each parent’s ability to provide stability, the child’s adjustment to school and community, each parent’s willingness to support the child’s relationship with the other parent, and the child’s own preferences when the child is old enough to voice them. Relocation or absence caused by domestic violence cannot be held against the affected parent.² For military families, past or potential future deployment cannot be the sole basis for a custody determination, though the court may consider how deployment affects the child.¹⁷

Costs to Expect Beyond Filing

The $150 filing fee is just the entry point. Sheriff service runs $30 per person served. If you hire an attorney for a contested case, retainers commonly range from a few thousand dollars to $10,000 or more depending on complexity and hourly rates. Even an uncontested case where an attorney drafts the agreement can run several hundred dollars.

If the judge orders a private custody evaluation — where a psychologist or social worker interviews both parents, the child, and sometimes teachers or therapists — costs can range from a few thousand dollars to well over $15,000. Courts don’t order evaluations in every case, but they’re more common when parents strongly disagree over custody or when allegations of abuse or mental health concerns come up. Plan for those potential costs early if your case looks headed for a contested hearing rather than a mediated agreement.

1
North Carolina General Assembly. North Carolina Code 7A-305 – Costs in Civil Actions
2
North Carolina General Assembly. North Carolina Code 50-13.2 – Action or Proceeding for Custody of Minor Child at Any Time
3
UNC School of Government. North Carolina Code 50A – Uniform Child-Custody Jurisdiction and Enforcement Act
4
Office of the Law Revision Counsel. 28 USC 1738A – Full Faith and Credit Given to Child Custody Determinations
5
North Carolina Judicial Branch. Child Custody Pro Se Packet
6
North Carolina Judicial Branch. AOC-CV-609 – Affidavit as to Status of Minor Child
7
North Carolina Judicial Branch. AOC-CV-100 – Civil Summons
8
North Carolina General Assembly. North Carolina Code Chapter 50 Article 1 – Section 50-13.5(f)
9
North Carolina Judicial Branch. Child Custody
10
North Carolina Judicial Branch. Petition to Proceed as an Indigent
11
North Carolina General Assembly. North Carolina Code 1-110 – Suit as an Indigent
12
North Carolina Judicial Branch. Rule 4 – How Do I Serve the Other Party with My Summons and Complaint
13
North Carolina General Assembly. North Carolina Code 7A-311 – Uniform Civil Process Fees
14
North Carolina General Assembly. North Carolina Code 50-13.5 – Procedure in Actions for Custody or Support of Minor Children
15
North Carolina General Assembly. North Carolina Code 50-13.1 – Action or Proceeding for Custody of Minor Child at Any Time
16
North Carolina Judicial Branch. Child Custody and Visitation Mediation Program
17
North Carolina General Assembly. North Carolina Code 50-13.2 – Action or Proceeding for Custody of Minor Child at Any Time